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Monday, August 16, 2004

Countdown to Toronto

All systems are go for my move to Toronto. Tomorrow I will confirm my flight with Westjet and get ready to head out on Thursday. To be honest, I don't know if I'm feeling excited or sad or both. In fact, I don't know if I should feel excited or sad or both. Frankly, I don't think it has really hit me that I will soon be moving away from the city that I grew up in.

When I started thinking about grad school a couple of years ago, I really saw it as a way to get out of this city. It wasn't so much that I thought the grass would be greener on the other side -- I don't even like grass -- I just wanted to live on my own for a while and see the world beyond Burnaby, PoCo, and Surrey. But now that I'm really leaving, the pesky little things that daydreams often gloss over are coming out to nag me. I'm talking about the little things like severing ties with close friends and family, and saying goodbye to people who I share an uncanny kindred spirit with. You know, little things like that. Things that just eat away at you and make you want to go back to your boss and beg for your old job back and cancel your Westjet ticket. Little things like that.

Anyways My Dear Reader, I know this is a pretty mushy entry, so I hope that you are not dissapointed with not getting your daily dose of ascerbic sarcasm from me today. But if you're still reading, bear with me for just a while longer.

Today's sermon at church was about the "Paradoxes in the Bible". In particular, the speaker emphasized the importance of gaining life through death. Don't worry, I'm not part of a cult whose members try to hail aliens and drink cyanide-laced koolaid to board the mothership. Death here is figurative and essentially means putting to death things in life that turn us away from Jesus. I'm still thinking about how to respond to this message. What ambitions and desires are keeping me away from Him? How do I put them to death? How do I turn away from them?Knowing what we should do and doing it are two different things. I know I should eat well and exercise to have a healthier physical body. I also know that turning away from worldly desires and focusing more on spiritual pursuits will give me a healthier spiritual body. I don't eat well nor do I excercise because I'm lazy and my doughy, squishy body reflects this negligence. But can I afford to let my spiritual body succomb to the same neglect? Today's message really resonated with me and I hope it can change me for the better. Oh yeah, I'm also going to start eating well and excersing (moderately)...starting in September.

Your Favorite Jerk


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