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Wednesday, January 12, 2005

Where is Liberia, anyways?

It's been a while since I've seen a movie in an honest-to-goodness theatre, so I decided to treat myself to a night at the cinema tonight. Jonny recommended that we go to see a "free" movie about the civil war in Liberia. Frankly, I don't know where Liberia is, but I do know what "free" is, so I took him up on his offer.

Evidently, I wasn't the only one who knew what "free" meant because by the time we got to the theatre at Bloor and Bathurst, there was a Soviet-era-waiting-for-bread sized lineup. My reaction to this queue can best be summed up by the words of a surprised fellow theatre goer: "Who the #*$% knew there would be so much interest in Liberia". I know I didn't! The sad thing was, the whole time I was standing there I wasn't thinking about the innocent people of Liberia; I was thinking about how warm it would be to go across the street to visit Honest Ed's, and how we could have been watching Meet the Fockers that very moment. In any case, the manager eventually told us that there would be no more room, so Jonny and I did end up going to visit Honest Ed's.

The gheto bars at the entrance to Honest Ed's told me that Honest Ed obviously thought that he was the only honest man in town, and even though he's "crazy about low prices" he's not crazy enough to let the riff-raff run off with his highly-discounted merchandise. I'll be honest here, Honest Ed isn't losing any money selling cheap merchandise. There wasn't really any great deals there except for the $1.99 sweatpants. With my laundry bills coming out to almost 4 dollars a load, I figure it may be cheaper to buy a bunch of these and throw them away when they get dirty. I think Honest Ed would have approved...and so would the kids who made these pants.

Your Favorite Jerk


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