Mee goreng with duck

I decided to skip the Samurai on account of tonight's DF barbeque. I didn't want to stuff myself before going to the feast because I was afraid it would have a negative impact on my ability to gorge. So, instead of having Vietnamese sushi, I decided to go to to my second favorite lunch distribution outlet Hawker's Delight. Hawker's is a very filthy looking hole-in-the-wall type of place on Main St. near King Edward St. that specializes in authentic malaysian street hawker cuisine. Now, someone (you know who you are) told me that her Singaporean friend told her that Hawker's is a fraud and does not serve real Malaysian food. But this is hearsay, and not very good hearsay at that; What do Singaporeans know about Malaysian food?

The owners of this restaurant have clearly spent a lot of time decorating the place to make their patrons believe they've been transported to a hawker's stall in a tropical country where the people are friendly and the food safety laws very very lax. The walls here are painted a putrid shade of green and are adorned with travel posters of Kuala Lumpur and other Malaysian tourist spots. The tables look old and worn out, but because the staff here do not wipe these tables down very often, many of them have retained a thin layer of black paint.

Today I chose to go with the Mee Goreng, a spicy thick noodle fried up in copius amounts of oil and served with a generous portion of chillis and dried tofu bits. The whole meal including tax cost me only $4.28 which just happened to be how much I had in loose change. I get an inexplicable satisfaction when I pay for things with exact change. The little math nerd in me always gives off a gleeful, girly shriek when the cashier puts my payment in the till and the display reads $0.00 in change. Perfection.

The weather today wasn't exceptional (in fact, it was very cloudy), but I decided to eat outdoors anyway. After I picked up my mee goreng, I drove to Queen Elizabeth park and sat down to share my lunch with the ducks that reside permanently at the pond there. I threw a piece of spicy tofu at one of the ducks, but this kind gesture of friendship was coldly rebuffed. Whatever. I'm better than ducks.

Your Favorite Jerk